He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
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