Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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