Don't you send me to vm
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
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