I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
