Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
My bed smells like the plague
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Randomize
