dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
