his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
