she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize