dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize