Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
