office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
My cat gives me a boner
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm gonna fight the coyote
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
