This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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