the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
