everyone is single if you try hard enough
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
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