Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
