Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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