Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
