ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Its about making memories worth repressing
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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