of course. lets lasso hookers.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
