what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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