she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Randomize
