can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
