i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
