but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
This is my gift to your gina
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
