i don't like sucking hair
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
We are all done wearing pants today
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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