You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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