dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
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