at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Randomize
