I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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