is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
