Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
