Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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