There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Randomize
