About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Randomize
