Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
