She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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