i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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