2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
