I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
