i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
