It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Randomize