Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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