i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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