Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
