Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize