Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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