im having a threesome with these popsicles
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Will exercising make me less horny?
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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