She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
and she was petting her beer can
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
