WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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