I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Randomize
